November 28

On the eve of this day we sat down on the floor and sang many songs with the friends we made along the way, the friends we fought to keep and foster and this thing together we’re negotiating like a precious new life. I want you to know desperately that every word, every gesture I utter in this place is love. It is hope that carries me toward this unknown future even though sometimes I walk backwards to avoid letting fear propel me forward. I have no choice in whether I exist, here and now, but since I have to, I am glad I can choose to face this moment with you. Beautiful friends make a happy tomorrow and the day after we will breathe relief into each other’s mouths and keep calling them back and making silly hearts with our fingers. Everything I put into these instants is love, and since worry will not stop until everything disappears, I choose to choose you, over and over again. You are the light, and the home, and the hope. And when you don’t want to be, I will be those things so you can catch your breath. It doesn’t matter at all, but it is love, anyway.